Jul 28, 2020
I have always done some chores around the house. For me they have included laundry, kitchen cleanup and the family finances. My past attitude has been to do them reluctantly, as needed, with an attitude of fulfilling an obligation.
Now during the pandemic, the chores are the same, but my attitude has changed. I am enjoying the smell of clean laundry and the sight of sparkling kitchen counters. I feel proud to have the responsibility and to get the chores done. I am surprised by that.
It is more than having a sense of accomplishment. For me it is about certainty and order. So much these days seems messy, menacing, and, most of all, uncertain. My chores are part of my “normal” routine. They have a daily and weekly rhythm around them. They are finite with beginnings and endings. When they are done, they’re done.
I won’t say that chores bring me joy, but they do provide some satisfaction. They help me feel that I have some control over my life.
What is giving you a sense of control over your life?
Jul 21, 2020
I have never experienced anything like the pandemic before. I know that experience is supposed to be the greatest teacher. The pandemic experience has given me still another opportunity to learn. As I reflect on what’s happened, here are some of the things I’ve learned about myself:
- I value in person socializing way more than I thought I did.
- It is hugely important in many ways to have meaningful conversations with my wife every day.
- It takes more energy now to strengthen friendships that it used to, but it’s worth it.
- I can get much work done in my home, even if working here is not my first choice.
- Learning, challenges, and achievements are important for me, in good times and bad.
- I can continue to enjoy my hobbies of biking and playing cello. They provide a sense of normalcy.
- I miss theater and concerts but friends and traveling most of all.
- It sure helped to have put money aside for a rainy day.
- Patience has never been a natural strength of mine, and impatience is worse for me during these difficult times.
I liked my life before the pandemic. And I like it now in spite of the pandemic. I just wish the pandemic would go away so that I can do what I am missing out on now.
What’s happening and what we’re supposed to do about it is changing rapidly. I suspect that there will be more lessons to learn as we and the pandemic develop.
What are you learning about yourself during the pandemic?
Jul 14, 2020
To me the pandemic is enervating. It feels like I have been punched in the stomach. I am gasping, trying to catch my breath. I refuse to give up. I am determined to accomplish something wonderful, in spite of it.
For me, my hobbies, as much as I enjoy them, are not enough. I love playing the cello, getting better, being able to play pieces that seemed impossible at first. I have accomplished a lot and I love the music, but I will never be an accomplished cellist. I also enjoy exploring on my bicycle. I will certainly never win any races.
What keeps me energized and focused, in spite of the pandemic, is my ambition to start my new career. I want to substantially improve the lives of my friends and clients through my hard work and creativity.
Getting my new career as a retirement coach going is taking more time and energy than I had anticipated. It is quite challenging. But strangely it centers me and gives me energy and even happiness. I enjoy the day-to-day work, and I look forward to having my new career up and running, to be making a difference in the lives of others.
What are you doing to overcome the energy-sapping pandemic?
Jul 7, 2020
To me the pandemic is enervating. It feels like I have been punched in the stomach. I am gasping, trying to catch my breath. I refuse to give up. I am determined to accomplish something wonderful, in spite of it.
For me, my hobbies, as much as I enjoy them, are not enough. I love playing the cello, getting better, being able to play pieces that seemed impossible at first. I have accomplished a lot and I love the music, but I will never be an accomplished cellist. I also enjoy exploring on my bicycle. I will certainly never win any races.
What keeps me energized and focused, in spite of the pandemic, is my ambition. I want to substantially improve the lives of my friends and clients through my hard work and creativity.
Getting my new career as a retirement coach going is taking more time and energy than I had anticipated. It is quite challenging. But strangely it centers me and gives me energy and even happiness. I enjoy the day-to-day work, and I look forward to having my new career up and running, to be making a difference in the lives of others.
What are you doing to overcome the energy-sapping pandemic?
Jun 23, 2020
In Meredith Willson’s 1957 Broadway musical “The Music Man” “Professor“ Harold Hill sings, “Well, ya got trouble, my friend, right here. I say, trouble right here in River City.” I think of this song whenever something really bad happens in Minneapolis / St Paul. Now is such a time.
The Twin Cities is where I live. It is my community. I am proud of it. Sometimes in a brutal winter here, a friend or relative will call me and exalt in their own warmer climate. I respond, “Yeah, but we have real weather here.”
I think of the people who live here as “real” people, with few pretensions. They are generally kind, friendly, respectful, and warm. However, if you are a person of color, you may have an entirely different experience including being hassled or even murdered by police. There is much work for us all to do to create a great life for everyone.
Many people here have embraced the idea of change. They are taking on this work. That is what the protests and demonstrations are all about. Their goals are noble, even if there was some initial violence from pent-up rage.
I am at high risk during the pandemic and cannot march with the protesters. Yet I still have responsibility. I have started 2 charities, one which helps people in a financial crisis. And I contribute money to the NAACP Legal Defense and Education Fund, which does great work in fighting injustice.
As I think about my own “River City,” I am proud to live here. I identify with those hoping to make my city a better place for all of us to live in.
What can you do to make your city a better place to live in?
Jun 15, 2020
I cope with the threat of the pandemic by wearing a mask and physically distancing myself from others. The senior facility rental where I live coped with the threat of vandalism from protesters by putting plywood over our outside windows. All these actions have so far been successful in preventing bad outcomes. They helped us get through difficult circumstances, although they did not address the root-causes of the situations.
Thriving is entirely different from coping. It is a proactive approach to life. Thriving can have many components. It is taking action to promote wellness in health and finances. It is using creativity to find meaning and joy in daily activities. To thrive is to have a vital life.
For me thriving has been using the time I have available during the quarantine to take interesting and challenging educational courses to build my skills. It has been reaching out over zoom to connect with friends, relatives, and even strangers. It has been pushing myself on my cello. It has been building a career that will improve the lives of others. When I put these all together, these activities give me energy and excitement.
Which is better – coping or thriving? Actually, you need both to have a life worth getting up for in the morning, a life that is complete.
What is one change you can make to thrive during these difficult times?
